The 1st of January comes along every year and every year most of us will make New Year resolutions. Unfortunately every year some of us don’t get to see them through.
On the 9th January 2013 a school friend was brutally murdered in his home in South Wales. The police have arrested an 18 year old for and he has been charged with the murder.
The friend was the same age as me with I am sure, had hopes and dreams for the coming year.
I have fond memories of hanging about with him in our village, in the youth club and riding about in his Capri. He could always make you laugh and had a lovely manner about him.
It was interesting to read and listen to the role alcohol played in his life and how different friends and local people initially reacted to his death.
“Oh he must have been drinking and fighting”
“He liked a drink and I bet that was the reason”
It was as if having a drink problem and being murdered was seen as an acceptable outcome.
I found this to be totally unacceptable, no-one deserves to be brutally murdered in their home. It shouldn’t make a difference whether they had or had not been drinking.
I saw a change in people’s reaction when it was mentioned that he had not been drinking for a while and then his death was seen as being horrendous and tragic.
Why does having an addiction or a perceived addiction make people act in such a way? Does addiction frighten them? Why is a social value placed on one death and not another?
It’s as if it excuses people from being morally responsible and not addressing issues in front of them.
In South Wales alcohol consumption has and always will be a large part of people’s life especially socially.
A drinking nation: Wales and alcohol 2010 report states:

“Over-consumption now manifestes itself both in the problem of binge-drinking in Wales’ town and city centres and in a trend towards heavier drinking at home, encouraged by a policy of deep-discounting of alcoholic drinks by supermarkets”

I know this affects the village I grew up in. Having 3 pubs and an off licence within walking distance of each other was a main focal point of my growing up and hanging about with my mates. The next village had a further 4/5 pubs and a conservative club so there was no shortage of alcohol.
With regard to those initial comments, I think people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones but should open their eyes and look at their relationship with alcohol. All death is tragic and needs to be respected.
Personally I have swapped one addiction for another, but that is a blog for another day.

RIP Tetley x